What did the boy get from his grandmother on Christmas. Nothing she died on Thanksgiving.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats The diference between a park bench and a black man? A park bench can support a family of five hahahhaahahah

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: what 10 year old WOULDN'T?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Yo momma so ugly, she makes french people say "you are ugly" in whatever language they speak.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Yo mamma's so stupid she failed the SAT.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did they name the team mavericks and why Was the maskot a horse? Because 50 years ago they found a blue horse And its name was maverick

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did Tim's grandma get him for his birthday? Nothing, because Tim's grandma died in a car accident 2 years ago

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why do elephants paint there feet yellow? so they can hide in mustard bottles. Have you ever seen an elephant in a mustard bottle? exactly

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Yo mama so fat and ugly, I don't want to tell you how fat and ugly she is for fear of vomiting.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What does a black person call black friday? Friday.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What grows on trees and is woody? Wood.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How many Azheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

knock knock , who is there the postman the postman who ? the postman who is gonna give you a bill !

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a black drug dealer? A black man that works as a drug dealer

thumb_up thumb_down -8

CISSY: TIMMY! COME AND DO YOUR HOMEWORK THIS INSTANT TIM: ....................../´¯/) ....................,/¯../ .................../..../ ............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸ ........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\ ........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...') .........\.................'...../ ..........''...\.......... _.·´ ............\..............( ..............\.............\... *CISSY SMACKS TIMMY AND SENDS HIM TO HIS ROOM WITHOUT DINNER.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I like my coffee like I like my women. Ground up and in the freezer

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why are you worrying about the chicken? You just got shot.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

slaughter the mussies #EDL

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

So a guy is on his way to work and he nearly gets hit by a bus. He sticks his middle finger up at the bus driver but a couple seconds later he realized that it was the same bus he was supposed to get on so he apologized to the bus driver and got on the bus. He was 15 minutes late for the 420th time this week so he was fired from his job and went back home. On his way home he was not allowed on the bus because he left his oyster card somewhere so he had to walk home. 69 minutes later he arrives home to his wife and kids. What did the man say to his wife when he got back home? "Hi."

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What happened to the teenager who was raped and murdered? Who knows? They never found the body.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red, Violets are blue, my dick is hard, and it's cumming for you.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

this is a haiku i have no idea where i am going with .... this

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops