So an irishmen, jewish, and asain walk into the bar...and the bartender said get out..

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you stop a plane? Land it.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Where's the soap?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A Christian and an Atheist are sitting next to each other in a bar. C: Sad you don't believe in God, 'cuz you'll go to hell after your death. A:I don't believe in hell neither..

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call five black me pushing a car? "Very nice young men who helped me when I broke down," according to my grandmother.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A tortoise went for a run. It took him two hours to get around the corner.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have said two factual statements.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the Jewish man say to the banana? Nothing, because he has common sense

thumb_up thumb_down +15

catastrophic anthropogenic global warming

thumb_up thumb_down +15

When life gives you a hamburger, you know you're at Mr. Life's Hamburger Stand on 8th Avenue.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A blonde walks into an electronic store...she buys an IPhone because someone stole her blackberry, her money, and everything she cares for. Nah, I'm just kiddin', she was murdered.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Holocaust jokes are in bad taste, Anne Frankly I won't have any of it.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the white man beat the black man in a fight? The white man was bigger. Also, he was a black belt in Brazillian Jiu Jitsu.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the crossing guard drop his whistle? Because a kid got hit by a passing elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's yellow and cant walk? The Sun

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What is Rebecca Blacks favorite resurant? T.G.I Fridays...

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's worse than spending time with Inlaws? Spending time with outlaws.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why cant little timmy ski? he was born without legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you not want to call a african american that begins with an N and ends with an R? A Neighbor!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops