why is andreas making a pizza? since he dosent get laid he likes the feeling of the sauce stinging on his dick

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Q: What would George Washinton do if he was alive today? A: Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

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A boy askes santa for a baby brother. Santa says give me your mom.

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Like this if you have a big diick like me Dislike if you have a baby diick Ignore if you're a girl and get back in the kitchen

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Why is Justin Bieber gay? Justin is attracted to the female gender

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Why did the Mexican cut his neighbor's lawn? His neighbor cut his lawn the previous week.

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Me: Hey mom Mom: Hey Son Me: Whats? for dinner? Mom: I dont know

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A woman asked a man in an elevator, "Did you fart?" The man honestly replied, "Yes. I didn't expect you to notice because it was the puffy kind."

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What did the blind pole vaulter say to the speed skater? Hi, how are you?

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Why do women have boobs? In order to feed their infants

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Why did the kid have no arms? A clown came and chopped them off.

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whats the difrence between a japaneese and chineese person? one is from japan and one is from china.

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Knock knock Who's there? The interrupting doctor The interrupting doct... You have Cancer

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Why Did The Black Man Cry? KFC Went Bankrupt!

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Why did man lay down? His dog ate his genitals.

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Happy Birthday! Your mom is dead!

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How do you get a elephant in a fridge? You open the fridge and put it in. How do you get a Rhino in a fridge? You take the elephant out and then put the rhino in. All the animals in the animal kingdom are at a meeting, what animal isn't there? The rhino, his in the fridge. How do you cross a river full of alligators? Walk across the allligators are at the meeting.

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Teacher: which vegetable makes your eyes water? Student: Any vegetable. Teacher: How? Student: Just rub any vegetable in your eyes and see what happens.

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Why was Stephanie sad? She dropped a washing machine on her toe

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesnt rhyme And your entire family died trying to fly to your house for Christmas. They crashed into a orpanage for death children. There were no survivors.

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What happens when a girl sticks her head in a birthday cake? She gets a toothpick stuck in her eyebrow. Trust me..I know.

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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An elderly lady walks into a grocery store, and nothing of a great significance happens.

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Meh, I dont want it anymore! You take it!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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