I had a quad when I was in high school, she was pretty but it was hard to get her out of the wheelchair.

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

why did the man ride the helicopter,because he was hurt horrible in a car accident.

Why did the chick cross the road? Because she's a gold digger homie, dat chick is greedy like a mofo. She be all up in your grill and sheit tryin' getchu to spend your money lik dat homie ditch dat hoe, she aint even worth it brotha.

nolan is gay

How do you make a plumber cry? You steal his princess

How many retards does it take to screw in a lightbulb? No number of them could figure it out. They sit in the dark for hours, scared of the monsters.

Why didn't the busy San Francisco business man hear his alarm clock ring this morning? A nuclear bomb blast occurred 700 meters from his front door. The estimated blast radius was approximately 100 square miles. Naturally, his alarm clock didn't make it.

irish man drinking john smiths

DON'T OPEN IT IT'S PANDORA'S BOX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? I don't know what they said, but one muffin, had a knife.

Why couldn't the man walk? He lost his legs when he stepped on a land mine in Afghanistan.

Q: What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? A: Ten babies nailed to eleven trees.

Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding the holocaust? A worm

What do you do when you find a blonde on her knees? Help her up, because obviously she has fallen.

Dora the explorer went on an adventure. sadly, all of the animals in the forest, including boots the monkey and swiper the fox, kill her as a sacrifice to an unknown God

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What did the rock say to the tree. It didn't say anything, rocks don't talk.

How do you have gay sex? I don't know ask Jordan Braun

Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia HOW THE HELL DID I GET HERE?!?

My mom always said that jumping in a pile of leaves was fun! That was before a 20 foot long iguana bit her head off...

The biggest lie ever. "I do" -Kim Kardashian

Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...