Whats 9 + 10 19

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Why do they call it lunchmeat? Because it is meat that you eat at lunch.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The brunette and the redhead escape, but the blonde is captured. Why? Because she had a prosthetic leg sustained from a previous injury, and thus couldn't run very fast.

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Politics.

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why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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Why was the mother crying Her son was killed by a meteor

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A guy with no legs walks into a bar.

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what did the schizophrenic get for his birthday? new friends

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whats worse than losing your pet rock? having your dog run over buy a car.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. I cut off his leg.

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Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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One time i was sitting down

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KNOCK KNOCK. who's there? Isdar Isdar who? Isdark in here.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sargeant John Smith mam. I regret to inform you that your husband died in the line of fire - I'm sorry.

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What's big, white and will killl you if it falls out of a tree? A polar bear.

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I'm gonna put my nut-sack on your drum set

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Why was the boy sad? Because he met Larry.

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A mogwai walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't feed mogwais after midnight."

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What's sadder than the Holocaust? Not a lot of things because it was probably one of the most depressing series of events that happened in the 20th Century.

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The night is always darkest just before the dawn. Just kidding I'm Helen Keller, everything's always dark.

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A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

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a man runs over his wife, who is at fault? -The man he shouldn't have been driving in the kitchen.

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Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

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Will you marry me? No, I'm cake.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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