Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, your entire family is dead.

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Roses are gray, violets are gray, everything's gray, bitch im a dog.

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I went to a magic show and the magician asked for my watch... He took the watch and then produced a doughnut... Guess what was in the doughnut? JAM!

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the Long face" The horse then storms out of the bar, wondering why every bartender must ask him that.

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What's sadder than the Holocaust? Not a lot of things because it was probably one of the most depressing series of events that happened in the 20th Century.

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Why was Jane absent from school today? Because she got mugged on her way there, and soon after was hit by a passing bus.

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Q: Why did Cinderella get cut from the softball team? Q: She ran away from the ball.

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What did one snowman say to the other? Hmm...smells like carrots.

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What do you call a small weapon used by northern russians? A Gun.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Why did the vegetarian only work one day? Because her co-workers are cannibals.

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i have cancer

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Arsonist: Hey, did you listen my mixtape? It's really FIRE.

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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Why was the man unable to get an erection? Because he was a woman

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What do you call an Italian baby born with an extra toe? He was named Vincent Antonio Linguini and has been doing well with six toes.

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thumbs up!

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How do you fit three gay men on a stool? You don't, that would be very uncomfortable.

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What happened after four homosexual clowns all squeezed into a little toy car simultaneously? Children and parents alike were amazed by this feat, and considered their $5 entrance fee very well spent.

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( I PLAYED SKRILLESX's SONG ON MAX VOLUME ) My neighbours loved? this so much they invited the police round!

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Q:: when artificial intelligence takes over the planet, what will become of anti-joke.com? A:: idk, but my cousin's girlfriend and I will get naked together and she will get on top of me and tell me I'm awesome and that my d*ck feels really good inside her. you see by the time AI takes over, the means to create virtual reality experiences will be greatly enhanced.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead.

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what did the penguin say to the dodo bird. nothing because dodo birds have bin extinct for thousands of years and it is highly unlikely for a dodo bird to be saying anything to a penguin do to the fact they wouldn't be anywhere near each other and neither species can speak.

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Gay jokes are a real pain in the butt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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