You're Like A Book I Want To Put You Down

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a pub. They order drinks, then leave without speaking to each other. It was pure coincidence they walked into the bar at the same time. They had no connections to each other, them being from three different countries.

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what do you call a man with no arms or legs? numerous abusive terms as you kickk him to death.

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Soccer...

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What's the difference between 10,000 dead babies and a Farari? I don't have a Farari in my garage.

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knock knock who's there? ketchup ketchup who? better catchup with me!

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What's long, black, and the tip is shaped like a mushroom? A mushroom.

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guess what? WHAT? Idk.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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Me: Knock Knock Mom: Who's there? Me: Jason Mom: Jason who Jason: HOW COULD YOU FORGET ME I CAN'T BELRIVE YOUR ALZHEIMER'S HAS GOTTEN THAT BAD! WHY DOES THIS HAPPEN TO ME BWAAA! *Jason sadly died short after from a bus hitting him*

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why don't you hit a black guy on a bike? because its probably your bike

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What is funnier than one dead baby? Two dead Babies

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A man walks into a bar and gets drunk. He then goes home and proceeds beating his many wives in a drunken fit of rage.

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What is shit? It's Deshitified already.

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A man walks into a bar. On the way home, he is driving, careers off the road and crashes. Lesson here. Don't walk into poles

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why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was very unhealthy, and had a heart attack attempting too

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Did you hear the one about the guy who couldnt find his shoes? No? ok ill talk to someone who will get the reference

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An Irish man, an English man, and a Scottish man are standing on the edge of a cliff. The English man and the Scottish man both fall of. The Irish man calls the authorities to alert them of this tragic misfortune.

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have you ever tried Ethiopian food? neither have they

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A woman walks into a bar.

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What do you call the Doctor who graduated at the bottom of his class? Doctor.

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Your momma so fat when she went to the beach she was to self concious and left her shirt on.

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A: Knock Knock B: Come in A: Come in Who B: Your Mum...

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one day a hippy and a nun wer on a bus, the hippy asks, Will you have sex with me? the none replies, heck no im a nun. the nun gets off the bus and the hippy follows. the bus driver stops him and says, i know how you can have sex with her, she goes to the cemitary at 9:00 every night, dress us as jesus and command her to have sex with you. okay thanks! the hippy says. that night the hippy dress's up as jesus finds the nun and says " i am jesus and i command you to have sex with me. The nun says okay but only A n a l because im a nun! and they get to it, when there done the hippy takes off his mask and says haha im the hippy, the nun takes off her mask and says haha im the bus driver!! like if you get it :)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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