Hey did you see Helen Keller's dress? No, she's dead.

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What happened to to dyslexic giraffe that tripped over a brick. It got back up.

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism. "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

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whats white and if it fell from a tree it would kill you ? Pat Butcher

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A man walks into a bar, he obtains an alcoholic beverage from the store neighboring this bar which he bumped into.

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Did you hear about the boy with the treehouse? He caught his mom cheating on his dad in there.

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What's brown and sticky? Vomit.

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What is the biggest lie ever? "I have read and agreed to the Terms of Use"

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why were the African, Asian and Mexican men thrown out of the bar the barman was a racist

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What did the Asian say to the American? herro. rook at me. i have round eye i american!

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Q: How do you make a plumber cry? A: Murder his family

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Nero? As In Nero7? Septimus? Where you not killed during the raid? I read you got tortured and killed by your own out of mercy.

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Q)A man and a women are hiking on a mountain trail. A bear appears. What do they do? A) Die.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Oh, And one of them has a penis.

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Why is a cat in the desert like Christmas? Because Egypt is a country of deserts, the Egyptians had cats and Jesus, Mary and Joseph escaped to Egypt in the Christmas story before Herod carried out his massacre in Bethlehem on baby boys of under two years old.

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How do you get a Jew into a car? Tell him to get i the car.

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A Jew walks into a shower. Gased.

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Who hangs out with a girl all day every day while he's dating her for 4 months and still doesn't get his wiener touched. Adam claypool

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How do you get a girl to pay for food? You Rape Her

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vatalk you are retarded!!!!!

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What's the difference between your wife and the kitchen? One is a living organism

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Then none of us want to be right.

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Do you know what's funnier than 24? 25

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How come Billy can only swim in circles? His right arm and right leg were amputated because he scraped his left arm.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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