One day a girl comes home crying to her father. Father, Father! She says, a boy i met touched my shoulder! Like this? Her father says and touches her shoulder. Yes just like that, a bad part was that he kissed me on my lips! Like this? her father says and kisses her on the lips. Yes just like that but the WORST thing was he stuck his you know what into my you know where. Like this? Her father says as he sticks his you know what into her you know where. Yes just like that father but he had AIDS! ......( Awkward silence)..... oh shit.

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why did Tommy fall of his bike? because he was getting raped by a walrus

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extraction interveal means the opposite of integer

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why couldn't max ride his bike? because max is a goldfish.

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why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

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What's worse then finding out that your partner has AIDS? I don't know actually, but finding out would suck pretty bad...

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Four guys walk into a bar. They buy their drinks and stay for a couple of hours. After they are done they get a cab ride home. It was a lovely night.

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Why was the orphan crying? Because his parents are dead.

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There once was a man from Nantucket I raped him. The End.

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A dog walks into a bar. A patron checks its tags and promptly calls the owner.

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What didn't last long? You in the bed

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Why is the ANTIJOKE symbol 2 mask faces crying? Because some people don't know how to write a good joke.

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A fairly-priced Apple computer.

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three men walked into a bar, the fourth one ducked

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Knock knock. Who's there? Get in the van, or I'll kill you.

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What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? It doesn't matter. You can call him anything you like, but he won't come running to you.

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Do unto others as others would do unto you, said the rapist.

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Jews who wear penny loafers...

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Two Jews walk into a bar. They order martinis and have a wonderful time.

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How do you keep a dog from barking? Kill it.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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What did the racist guy say at the baseball game? I am at a baseball game.

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What did God say to the Priest? Nothing, there is no God

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What do you call your mother? Mom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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