What did the doctor say to his dying patient? Shit happens.

Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

Q. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become? A. It will Wet or Sink, as simple as that.

A man sees a hitchhiker on a road. The man crashes because he was not watching the road.

A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

Whats red and is bad for your teeth? A brick.

Joey and Jack walked into a bar, and proceeded to have gay sex on the floor.

Q: What did the bulbasaur say to the charmanderr?? A: bulbasaurrr

Why did the man push open the door? The sign said PUSH.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Shoo! Shoo! Get out! Hey! Who's horse is this? I don't want a horse in my bar!"

What did the gay man say to the other gay man? “How was your day?“

why did the shark cross the road It didn't its a shark

How are a duck and a bicycle the same? They both have handlebars. Except the duck.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a random biological stimulus compelled it to.

Two men are walking. The first one ask "what time is it?". They die.

Knock, knock Who's there? Who. Who who? ... Who?

a man killed wife. he successfully rid the scene of all evidence and buried the body under a bridge. unfortunately he forgot to bury the head and went to jail for life.

What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

what did the kid say when the bully took his ice cream nothing the bully punched him in the face first.

Hitler. lol, sucks.

How did the kid drop his ice cream cone? Ans. He got hit by a bus

Why did the chicken crossed the ro- oh hell naw she crossed it.... No more chicken jokes, guys!!! She crossed it!!!

A black guy gets arrested...

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are driving in a car. They're on their way to the mall, or something.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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