What is the most dangerous gull in the world? A gull with a machine gun!

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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A woman is about to buy a house and is faced with a difficult decision. She must choose which house she'll buy the next day. During the night she thinks about it and the next morning she has made a rational decision. What house did she choose ? TRICK QUESTION - Women can't make rational decisions.

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YOLO

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Your momma so fat she can eat 10 of your 300lb friends.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was tomato...

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Why was the boy confused? Because somebody had been running around in circles around him and throwing plastic cups at his face.

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3 out of 4 questions. The lion king was holding a meeting and every animal was there except for one. What animal wasn't there? The elephant. It was still in the fridge.

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MWAAHHHHHAHAHHAH

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Hey hey what did the bald man say to brian moccia? lOL!

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What do you call a Muslim driving a plane? You don't drive a plane.

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here's a joke: Ron Paul: Hope for America

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A murder, a cheater, and a liar walk into a bar..... Woah the aptriots must be in town -Rocco Tufano

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Shoo! Shoo! Get out! Hey! Who's horse is this? I don't want a horse in my bar!"

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A skeleton walks into a bar. It's inside a person. He orders a beer and enjoys it contentedly.

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Why do black people love menthol? Nobody knows.

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A traveling salesman came into town and needed a place to stay for the night. A farmer told him that he could sleep at his house, where he introduced the salesman to his young, sexy daughter. "Why hello," said the salesman. It's very nice to meet you." And then he went to sleep in the bedroom that the farmer had prepared for him.

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A jew goes to a bar,then wakes up with presents under his candels.

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What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

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A guy vociferiously kills another person- fueled by the incentive of personal gain provided by his rapacious, human nature. He is an army soldier who's triumphant in battle and hoping to recieve a promotion. However, ultimately all he did was essentially insignificantt and his acts of purported valor were diametrically unnoticed by all except for his closest friends/allies. He never did supass his original self of a soldier and died of a natural cause that was disclosed only to the members of his immediate family.

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Did you hear about the fetus who met a clothes hanger? I doubt very much that you did.

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How do you kill a blond? Make her listen to the song "Friday" for two hours straight.

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how do you make a janeter cry, you shit on the floor

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Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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