Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, your entire family is dead.

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i came... i saw... -myself when i came.

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My wife has terminal cancer.

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Why was the boy embarassed at school? He got a noticable boner during class.

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Why did the catholic priest go to jail He was a paedophile

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Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. One looks at the other and says, "Can you pass the soap?" The other penguin says, "What do i look like, a typewriter?"

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Q: Why did Cinderella get cut from the softball team? Q: She ran away from the ball.

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My mom touched my wiener : \

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car?.. Your Imagination

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Have you tried Honeybunches of Oats?

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? She didn't have arms

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your mama is so fat that she weighs 261 pounds.

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A man walks into a bar and slowly draws a pistol and kills 5 people.

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What do you call a muslim with an RPG? Holy Shiite

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What do you call a bunny with a knife in his chest? Emo

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What do you call a guy with newmonya? Not good at spelling

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Yo Mamma

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Why was John the octopus depressed? Because his real name was Steve, and he couldn't communicate this to anyone since he lacked the higher brain functions and vocal chords required to do so.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? They may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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How many black people does it take to screw in a lightbulb?. I dont know either it was dark.

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YOLO

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What do homosexual men do during sex? I don't know, but if you want to, I suggest you ask one of them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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