On a scale of one to 10, F*ck yourself.

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What’s green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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Yo Momma's so old... She has lived a great life and you should be very proud of her even though she is slowly dying of a degenerative disease.

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Why did the man mysteriously disappear? Because he was hiding without telling anyone that he was hiding.

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What do you do to someone you hate very much? You kill them.

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why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have Alzheimers, Cheese on Toast.

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extraction interveal means the opposite of integer

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead.

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Q: What did the one legged homeless person get for christmass? A: Frostbite.

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Once upon a time there was a very lonely man. He was kind, strong, handsome, smart, and basically everything that was good and that a girl wanted. Well, one day, through all his immense loneliness, he decided that it was time that he got into a relationship. Knowing that he deserved a competent and pure woman, he went to a local church to search for his perfect match. That night, he took home with him the most beautiful and purest of all the women in the church, brought her to his room, and whipped out his junk on her face.

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Your eye color is very unique.

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A nun, a jew, and a KKK member are all stuck together in a lifeboat. A large wave overturns the boat and they all drown.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Atch! Okay.

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Why did the black man buy a watermelon? Because it tastes good.

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clamidia

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How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. Midgets are capable of doing an average person's everyday task. Unless they have autism, then they might as well die.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the Long face" The horse then storms out of the bar, wondering why every bartender must ask him that.

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Why are leprechauns so happy? The grass tickles their balls

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How many Facebook friends does George Bush have? None because he doesn't have a Facebook.

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Your mama is so poor that she is on welfare, but she is ashamed to tell you and cries herself to sleep every night.

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The night is always darkest just before the dawn. Just kidding I'm Helen Keller, everything's always dark.

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Ran into my ex last night, so I put my truck in reverse and did it again.

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I have a knock knock joke. You start.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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