Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She's a women.

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a guy walks into a bar. unexpectedly, a terrorist walks in and shoots him in the head. After lots of therapy he can now go back to his average life.

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Whats the difference between black and white? nothing,because in art they are just shades.

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In Soviet Russia... People were burned alive for refusing communism.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Depending on whether you have permission to eat it, either stolen property, or a nice snack shared between friends.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody. You'reschizophrenic and are hearing things. Go see a doctor. Now.

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Walk in to a room and sing "if you're deaf and you know it, clap your hands!"

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Why is Kim Jong Un so fat? Because he takes all the food in the country and sends his own people to live in concentration camps!

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A Horse walks into a bar. So the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The Horse replies "My jockey raped me".

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I went to a magic show and the magician asked for my watch... He took the watch and then produced a doughnut... Guess what was in the doughnut? JAM!

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Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

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What did the fish say when it swam into the concrete wall? Nothing. Fish cannot speak

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Amedeo Clemente Modigliani was an Italian artist who worked mainly in France. Primarily a figurative artist, he became known for paintings and sculptures in a modern style characterized by mask-like faces and elongation of form. He died in Paris of tubercular meningitis, exacerbated by poverty, overwork, and addiction to alcohol and narcotics.

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Why did the pigeon rape itself? It had mental issues.

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how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

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how do you make a fat black man cry? Rape his wife.

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you know what they say... hydrate or die

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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A blond walks into a bar. She orders a drink.

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Q:why did the girl fall off the swing set? A:she had no arms

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what is white and red all over? a ginger

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why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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What do you call a Muslim driving a plane? You don't drive a plane.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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