what did the little girl find when she opened the freezer in her basement? food.

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It's funny, because she's twice his size!

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What did the blind man say to the deaf man? It doesn't matter because the deaf man couldn't hear him.

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My friend came out.....of the bathroom so I could shit

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a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

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Past, Present and Future walk into a bar. It was tense...

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? a fsh

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Knock knock! Who's there? Atch! Okay.

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A jew, a black man, a muslim, an atheist, a christian, a catholic, a roman, a russian, a cuban, an english man, a horse, a cow boy, a gay, a lesbian, a dancer, a teacher, a father, a mayor, a politician and a fish are in a bar. Now that's one crowded bar.

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Why did the Booger cross the road? because He was getting picked on....

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Why was Jeremy slow? He wasnt fast.

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what looks like a banana, smells like like a banana, but isn't a banana? a fake banana

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What's funner than a barrel of monkeys ? Not the Holocaust .

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Roses are Red Voilets are Red I am Red I am Dead

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Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

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Yah? Well your a ********

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What do you call a black pilot? Whatever his name is, you racist.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to vote off obama

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What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt? Getting stabbed.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck CAN chuck wood, that's why his a wood chuck.

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are finally spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinical depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Amblyopsidae, or blindfish, commonly found in caves where they are well adapted to life in the dark.

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What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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