Why can't Michel Jackson play chess? He's dead

What did one fat chick say to the other fat chick? Who cares, they're fat.

What came first... the chicken or the egg? How am I supposed to know?

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie roll pop? It would have to take a reasonable amount of licks for enough enzymes in the saliva to breakdown the hard candy part.

Why did the long term smoker suddenly stop smoking? Because he had a heart attack.

Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea. A: Tsunami victims.

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? He didn't, animal control took the dog away from Helen because she could not properly care for the dog.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was attempting to get back to his farm.

Are you gay. No. Ok.

whats worse than a paper cut? 2012

If David has 40 chocolate bars and eats 35 what does David have now? Diabetes, David has diabetes.

What's worse than having cancer? Two people having cancer

How can you tell if someone is vegan? -they'll tell you

Your mamma used to be fat till Slim Fast came out with dick flavor!

Whats worse than death? Getting expelled from Hogwarts

he took my chicken i shoot him in the foot and raped his dog

My wife made me a sandwich

who is the shortest man in the world? ADITYA DEV

A tortoise went for a run. It took him two hours to get around the corner.

Here's a joke The Holocaust.

what did the kid with no head get for his birthday? A coffin.

identical jokes get different votes.

Why did the boy fall off the swings? He had no arms.

what is white on top and black on the bottom? society... ha ha

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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