Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm not sure, but the farmer must be very upset about the loss of one of his chickens.

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What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt says thanks.

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Q: How much old could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Wood A:10.6 cubic metes

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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Why wasn't the little boy allowed to get a dog? Because the orphanage he lives at doesn't allow dogs.

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why did the baby start crying? because he was very hungry and hadn't been feed all day

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Charlie Sheen Walks Into a Rehab Center.....

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what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

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Your momma is so black that she probably has ancestors indigenous to Africa.

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What's white and red all over? A white guy who walked in the ghetto.

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Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a M.afia boss so they put him in prison.

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So, this cheerio is in love with a beautiful frosted cheerio. He asks her on a date. She says no, because she only dates other frosted cheerios. So the cheerio works really hard at his job and is promoted to a honey-nut cheerio. So he asks her out again. She says no because she only dates frosted cheerios. So he works even harder and is made a frosted cheerio. He asks her out again and she accepts. 4 months later after a relationship built on trust and understanding they are married and live a long and fullfilling life together.

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See now, that is because you consider yourself my submissive on a both concious and subconcious level, your body and mind wants me to take care of you. I could say it is because I read minds, but why read minds, when I can create them, why read the future, when you can create it. Finally, lets take a look into the word, nerve endings yes? Not nerve endings baby, its called Suggestion. But seriously though, lets put the word nerve endings on top of the word suggestions again there. Nerve endings, did I mention it works on your butt too? You see, usually you would say no, but you do know that now that I am your master, you do and enjoy as I say? See you baby. Moral: "Feel the grove, I control the way you move"

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When is a door not a door? When it's a pair of titties!

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OMG YOU BOUGHT ME FLOWERS THANK YOU

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Why can't Larry drive? Larry's a rock.

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Want to hear a joke? Women's rights.

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a blind man walks down the street and trips on an unsuspecting curb he scraped his knee

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Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

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Why did Timmy miss school? He was killed in a tragic school bus accident

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Why did the turtle take so long on his run? Because he never went on a run he walked.

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Why doesn't the man like iced tea? Because he likes it hot.

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Why did Sally drop her Ice Cream Cone? Because her dog licked her butthole.

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Double-whammy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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