how much does a pirate pay for an earing? $2.50

What do you call a Mexican named Chicee? Chicee

Netball.

why did the pile of rocks cross the road? they were stuffed down the chickens throat

why couldnt the mexican jump the fence? He broke his leg.

Two men walk into a bar, the third man ducks.

What's big, white and will killl you if it falls out of a tree? A polar bear.

Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

why doesnt cornelia say anything? she didnt answer

Who would win in a fight, Godzilla or a Tyrannosaurus Rex? It doesn't matter because Godzilla is fictional and a T-Rex is extinct.

So - this baby seal walked into a club.

Why did the little boy drop his Icecream? Because I ran him over with my Bus!!

A violent biker gang walks into a bar to have a few drinks, the bar tender says "I'm sorry we can not serve you here." They then proceed to beat the man violently.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the Long face" The horse then storms out of the bar, wondering why every bartender must ask him that.

Q: Why did Cinderella get cut from the softball team? Q: She ran away from the ball.

A suicide bomber enters a bar. Everyone dies.

Have you tried Honeybunches of Oats?

What's the difference between a Porche and a Pile of dead babies? I don't have a Porche in my garage.

And if a chicken had wings it wouldn't bump it's butt when it landed.

Don't you hate the retarded smart people who think anti-jokes are all about really explaining but adding sarcasm? Yes.

Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: nobody knows, but the road was royally pissed off.

How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

Q:why did the girl fall off the swing set? A:she had no arms

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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