How do you occupy a blonde for a day ? You put her in a round room and tell her to sit in a corner. ... That or you strap a bomb to her, give her a list of twelve billion things to do, and tell her the bomb will explode if she doesn't do everything on the list.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? He had cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She's a women.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Knock knock! Who's there? Atch! Okay.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Fred awoke and looked outside. The sun was rising over the fog in the valley below. Birds were singing, and the air smelled of freshly cut grass. THIS was the day, Fred thought, that I'm going to kill my wife and kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? I don't eat hot dogs. Thank you though.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call a black guy with a shotgun? A fine American citizen exercising his 2nd Amendment right.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do Kenyans do at night? Starve.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Diana and victoria

thumb_up thumb_down +22

If Dwayne the Rock Johnson was short who would he look like? Dwayne the Rock Johnson.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

So - this baby seal walked into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

1.Knock Knock 2.Who's there? 1.Boo 2.Boo Wh- The second person realized that the first person was about to make him cry so he stabbed the first person. 2.Who's cryin now Son!

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Who owns the streets of Comton The mayor

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How did the kid drop his ice cream cone? Ans. He got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. One looks at the other and says, "Can you pass the soap?" The other penguin says, "What do i look like, a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was the man squinting his face for so long? He was constipated and couldn't give a shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

When does the baby talk When you remove ypur feet from its mouth

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Yo mama's so fat, she possesses a Body Mass Index that is above the recommended value for healthy individuals and thus will have a greater risk for heart disease and other related health problems.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What does a dyslexic person call God? Dog

thumb_up thumb_down +2

knock knock. no one's home..

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call 2 black men next to me. 2 Dead Men

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why couldn't hellen keller drive becasue she was a women

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops