"Do you know the joke about the No and Me Neither?" "No..." "Me neither."

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i think i have a problem with these jokes they aren't finny

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What do you call a three legged man? Horribly deformed

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Two muffins are in an oven. They are then baked at 375 for about 30 minutes and then taken out to cool.

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There was a small boy with a lollipop and a spinning hat. He died of lieukemia.

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LOL -LOL GUY

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A man walked into a bar. It was closed, so I don't see how this was possible.

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Why was little timmy's arm crooked His mom tried to pull his arm off.

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Knock knock. Whose there. Uninterupting black lady. Uninter.... MMMMMMMHHHHMMMM. Black ladies never listen

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How many fairies does it take to screw in a light bulb? If you still believe in fairies, there's something wrong with you.

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How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

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whats worse than getting a fail on your math test? Getting shot.

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Whats worse then the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple

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When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

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What's green, red, and goes fifty miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

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Why did the hamster run around the wheel.? Because he lived in a small cage and had nothing better to do.

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A Mexican, and Arab and an American are on a plane. The the plane is going down. It hits a mountain and crashes. But there was also a lot of other people on the plane. Families, children, loved ones. It was huge a disaster.

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Animal

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So an asian man gets into a car... and drives home on the highway driving at the approximate speed of the designated speed limit while exhibiting safe driving maneuvers. He arrives home to his wife and kids and sits down for a nice dinner while having a engaging conversation about the political future of the United States and his favorite football team.

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A man who is down on his luck was told that when one door closes a window opens. So he jumped out.

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what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names.

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Why was the black guy good at basketball? He practiced hard everyday.

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A Squirrel jumps into a bar, lands on one of the empty tables and begins eating the Peanuts out of a bowl. The bartender thinks to himself "I really should close that window to keep the Squirrels out..."

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You are such a loner nothing even clings to you, not even plastic wrap!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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