A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I have cancer"

thumb_up thumb_down +35

KNOCK KNOCK. who's there? Isdar Isdar who? Isdark in here.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Past, Present and Future walk into a bar. It was tense...

thumb_up thumb_down +33

"I see London; I see France..." "Wow. You must have exceptional eyesight."

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Knock knock! Who's there? Atch! Okay.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

thumb_up thumb_down +29

what did the atheist get for Christmas? Nothing. If he was being truly honest to his beliefs, he wouldn't partake in a christian holiday.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Your mother." "Your mother who?" "Really?"

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the Booger cross the road? because He was getting picked on....

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a grocery store. As they walk past the meat section, the Priest stops, smiles, and turns to the Rabbi. "Feeling Hungry?" The Rabbi reaches down and picks up a pack of Koscher hotdogs.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What makes fat kids laugh? Jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Yah? Well your a ********

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How many hispanics does it take to screw in a light bulb. One. Just one. You just screw it in, it's not that complicated.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the boy only have one arm? tigers make terrible pets

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why does bobby have no friends? He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why couldnt hellen keller drive? cuz she was blind

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken decided go get cigarettes and then hang out at a bar. The chicken sitts next to horse, the horse says "Why the sad face?" The chicken justs sitts there, thinking about the insanity that he has caused. "I don't know, is my joke not getting old?" Replied the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Your momma's so ugly she adopted you because she had a problem attracting men.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why cant the black guy vote? because hes not 18 yet.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Even though Jenny was retarded, her parents didn't love her any less than the family dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the boy cry? Because he was mercilessly beaten by his mother.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What is the loneliest number to exist? Zero. Except it's not lonely. I'm just saying there are zero lonely numbers. Numbers aren't sentient. They can't feel loneliness.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops