there's a blonde and a brunette jumping out of a plane, what one hits the ground first? they both hit at the same time because gravity pulls everything down towards the earth at the same pace

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A criminal walks into a bar, and shoots the bartender and has his way with the waitress. Its his bar now.

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What's the difference between a dead black man in the road, and a dead dog in the road? One is a human being that probably leaves behind family and friends that will miss his absence. The other is an animal that will also be missed, but to a lesser degree since dogs don't form a bond with people other than the family it shared its life with. In either of the two cases, if I witnessed the accident that caused the death, I would promptly notify the authorities so as to make sure that the driver of the vehicle that hit them would be subjected to a breathalyzer test.

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What did batman say to robin before they entered the batmobile? Get in.

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What's funnier than 1 anti- joke? Two anti- jokes.

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Lambos are red Tuxedos are Blue The cat is out of the bag Shit, we're all gonna die in helll

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I killed your family, and now i'm coming after you.

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So Helen Keller walks into a bar...

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Why was the boy walking in circles? One of his feet was nailed to the floor...

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whats black and doesnt like politics? a black chair

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What's black when its clean and white when its dirty? A black guy that rolls in flour.

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Why did the jews get off the bus? Because i threw a fridge at it

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You know how hitler wasn't accepted into the art school ? The teacher who didn't let him join was Jewish .

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roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

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Why do They call a horse a horse? Because They speak English.

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

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Whats green, has four legs, and falls out of a tree? A Pool Table. Use your imagination.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her

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Why was the man struck by lightning? Josh Mathai was there.

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a group of jews went to a factory to apply for jobs. Only one came out.

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What's worse then three frogs playing leap frog? Nothing that would be awesome

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a serial killer.

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How do you make Bill Gates poor? You take all of his money

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Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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