Think about this. I am lying to you right now.

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What do you give an obese person with diabetes? Insulin.

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A man is having dinner with his family at a restaurant. While eating his food, the father tells the waiter,"This food is delicious! My complements to the Chef." When the waiter comes back to the kitchen he says "You are a very handsome man."

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What has five balls and hates Mexicans? The lottery.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Warenth Gibson. Warenth Gibson who? Warenth Gibson. What part of that don't you get?

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A black guy gets arrested...

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why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car?.. Your Imagination

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Why did the orange have to wear a tie to the party? Because Rodric the Pear suggested it.

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What's worse than people repeating a joke about a handicapped child and voting down original, funny, anti-material? Knowing that millions of cubic decimetres of precious air and thousands of tonnes of food are being wasted every day to sustain them...

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how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

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Why did the pilot crash the plane? It was a tomato.

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What is the punchline of this joke? There isn't one.

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Q: How many cows does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Infinite, cows do not have thumbs, in fact, they have hooves. This disables them from holding any large objects without the use of their mouthes.

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Knock knock, Whos there Nig.ger Nig.ger who Fu.ck all nig.gers.

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anti-joke teehee

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Arent you my dark knight in black armor, you would seriously put your life on the line for my sake?

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What's funnier than 24? 25.

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A woman is about to buy a house and is faced with a difficult decision. She must choose which house she'll buy the next day. During the night she thinks about it and the next morning she has made a rational decision. What house did she choose ? TRICK QUESTION - Women can't make rational decisions.

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Your mama is so fat... she really should go on a diet.

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who farted i did :]

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Why did Dave buy a playstation? Because he wanted one.

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So its 1945, and these two blonds walk into a bar....I forget the rest of the joke, but Japan ends up getting nuked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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