when god gives you lemons, you find a new god!

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What happened to the guy who ate the alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He died

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Obviously.

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What do you call a dead blond in a closet? A homicide victim.

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Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

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Q. What's green and will kill you if it falls out of a tree A. A pool table

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A man walks into a bar... But, it's not funny because he's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

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Sarah Palin

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My wife has terminal cancer.

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what did the atheist get for Christmas? Nothing. If he was being truly honest to his beliefs, he wouldn't partake in a christian holiday.

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A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

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What did the black person say when his white friend said "Nigga!"? "You know, I really don't get racist jokes like this."

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96

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How many republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Typically only one, though more may be required under extreme conditions.

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A black guy gets arrested...

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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guess what the quarterback did he threw the ball!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Suisidal

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knock! knock! who's there? mom mom who? your mom... your girlfriend just died in a car accident while carrying you baby...

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Why did hitler kill all the Jews? He is racist

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Were do you find a dog with no legs ? Were you left him

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Why did the boy cry? because his tear-ducts were agitated by an emotional reaction due to jokes that were ironically hilarious because of how bland and usual the punchlines were

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops