How does Batman's mom call him home for supper? Nothing. Batman's mom is dead.

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How did the black man cross the Atlantic? An airplane. He also could have used a boat. However, airplanes are a preferred form of travel.

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What's worse than walking into a door by accident? Finding out that your mother molestors children.

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Knock knock, "Whos there" a business man who wants to sell you things that you don't need "Oh, go away"

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pretty soon we'll all be dead

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Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and they smell bad.

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how do you make a baby float? you take your foot off its head

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i walk into a bar,and then proceed to be taken out because i am a minor -chuckles

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How do you get a bear out of tree? You shoot it

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Knock knock Come in

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What did the angry asian man do after he crashed his car? He died of serious head trauma and internal bleeding.

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Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are powerful machines, capable of dismemberment and death when wielded by someone who wishes to cause harm

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Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

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What do you call a lawyer without a brain? -Dead

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How did the hot blonde get a promotion from her boss? She worked really hard and achieved more thaan her coworkers.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Xiao Kaan Xiao kaan who? Fu*k you ugly lauuhhh

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How much wood could a Woodchuck chuck if a Woodchuck could chuck wood? The etymology of the name woodchuck is unrelated to wood or chucking

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Patient: Doctor Doctor! Every Time I Drink Some Tea, My Eye Is Really Sore! Doctor: Next Time Take The Spoon Out...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well I'll tell you. He was happily gliding down the sidewalk when he realized that his destination was across the road. He then proceeds to take In his surroundings . He finds that there is no indication telling him to stop so he then cautiously walks across the road watching for any dangerous movement. He safely makes it across and proceeds to his destination which is the slaughtering house. He is a retarded chicken

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Whats better than giving birth to a disabled son? A Blowjob

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I was just thinking in something I swear ... I am still Just, wait, i'll be good

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He is seriously pissed off about being repeatedly subjected to this level of intense interrogation. Do you ask other animals why they chase their tails or claw at dirt? Do people ask you why you run when you're late? How would you like to have every move you made transformed into some cliche, old farce? There's a road, he's a chicken, there are only so many possible outcomes.

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Knock knock Who's there? Derek the crazy man in the village and I have come to shoot you.

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What does the gay man do while he is taking a shower with many other men in a prison or a gym? Lathers soap all over his body to clean himself so he is not smelly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops