What happened to the guy who ate the alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He died

What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

Whats Red and smells like Blue Paint? Red Paint.

Do you know what really makes me smile? Facial Muscles.

What did the blonde say to the priest? Probably something stupid due to the fact that she's blonde.

Rebecca Black's new album.

Knock Knock. Ow! Why you hit me!?

how do you make a janeter cry, you shit on the floor

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!'' The woman gets off the bus and files a complaint with the public transit system and the driver loses his job.

Whats the difference between black and white? nothing,because in art they are just shades.

What do you call a black guy with a shotgun? A fine American citizen exercising his 2nd Amendment right.

My wife has terminal cancer.

What do you give an obese person with diabetes? Insulin.

Whats round, hard, and full of seaman? Well in the context I'm using it in, a submarine, but too the inappropriate mind when spoken out loud, could be registered as the homophone of seaman, semen, which would then lead you too think of male genitalia.

Why did the plane crash into the mountain? Because it was being piloted by a loaf of bread.

What's sadder than the Holocaust? Not a lot of things because it was probably one of the most depressing series of events that happened in the 20th Century.

Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Cancer.

Theres 3 guys walking and the see a genie. He says hell grant 3 wishes. The first guy asked for sandals. The genie said"I can do that" and he got sandals. The second guy asked for rock hard abs.The genie said,"sure thing".When he looked down, he saw that he had rock hard abs. The third guy asked for a pair of pants."ok" Said the genie. And then he got a pair of pants.

Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

How did the leukemia patient die? He was shot in the leg repeatedly until he died of blood loss.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Warenth Gibson. Warenth Gibson who? Warenth Gibson. What part of that don't you get?

What's the number one killer in America? Death.

knock knock. no one's home..

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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