Wanna hear a Harry Potter joke? Knock Knock Who's there? You know You know who?

thumb_up thumb_down +47

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is created to be used by multiple people for sitting down or other forms of rest, and does not have consciousness or the complex body systems of humans and other animals.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Chikin nuggets

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

thumb_up thumb_down +27

The economy.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Your mother." "Your mother who?" "Really?"

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why was the boy sad? Because he met Larry.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what looks like a banana, smells like like a banana, but isn't a banana? a fake banana

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's the difference between a red cube and a green cube? Nothing, I'm color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A mogwai walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't feed mogwais after midnight."

thumb_up thumb_down +15

QUESTION: Why do black people do so poorly in school? ANSWER: Some statistics point to genetic disparities in intelligence between races, but others say it is due to more complicated social factors.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's worse than getting Alzheimer's? ........what am I doing here.....

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Amblyopsidae, or blindfish, commonly found in caves where they are well adapted to life in the dark.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Knock-knock. Who's there? Just open the damn door

thumb_up thumb_down +11

There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are finally spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinical depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

It was the eve of December and a man was using a blanket why? because it was cold and he wanted to be able to function properly at work so his boss would not get mad at him because he respected his boss and wanted to make him happy

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the student fall asleep during class? He was very tried from staying up too late.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do u call a guy that loves the color blue? A smurf

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A girl walks into a bar she is then drugged, raped and left in a back alley. To this day she still has psychological issues that are directly related to this event

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Goats are like mushrooms. If you shoot a duck, I'm afraid of toasters.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

why cant the black guy vote? because hes not 18 yet.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why didn't the boomerang return? It hit a baby

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops