Nickelback

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender say, "Sorry, we don't serve your kind here." The man continues to order a drink when he realises the comment was directed at the elephant standind behind him.

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I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! In for a penny, in for a pound. I'm Donald Trump!

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he's usually in a good mood.

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A terrorist gets on a plane. He has a pleasant flight and gets off in a new country.

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Why the kid fall of his bike? He got hit by a fridge.

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How you know that you are flying with a "no frills" airline? There are no meals or films provided, no orange juice to drink during ascent and descent and no mid-flight shop service.

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

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Why did they save the man in a burning building? To arrest him for arson.

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Q. Why didn't the man tell his girlfriend about his big lottery win? A. Because it was none of her business.

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Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Keep talking shit bitch, and I'll come for you!

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Q: What's worse than finding a fly in your soup? A: Getting your face smashed with a hammer.

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How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

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Two egyptian soccerclubs are playing, what's the score? Over 70 dead

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What's the same about a duck-billed platypus and a duck? They both have a duck bill on their face... Duh!

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On a scale of 1 to 10, how high are you? Very.

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You know what's worse than finding a worm inside an apple? finding crack, too late to spit it out.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, whoever met you is a BIG fool

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Guy 1: When your Justin Beiber af. Guy 2: What Guy 1: Do you mean

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What's scarier than the most horrifying monster you can think of? The thought of Donald Trump becoming president!

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Roses are red, Wait. Why start this poem when you cant finish it Refrigerator

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What do you get when you take a bag of chips and divide it by 5? a Nike store worker's meal

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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