Q:What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor?

Whats worse than 1 bee sting? 2 bee stings,whats worse than 2 bee stings? The holocaust Whats worse than the holocaust?.. 3 bee stings

Pain is temporary. However, the scars from 3rd degree burns are forever.

How do you trick the devil? You give him a ginger.

What did the rake say to the shovel? Nothing, they're both inanimate objects.

Man: Knock knock Man 2: who's there Alzheimer's patient: to get to the other side!

What is the opposite of pro? Con right? So what's the opposite of progress? Congress

Did you hear about the guy who had his head chopped off? He's dead.

How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Well, one must question: 1. How much the electrician knows when it comes to screwing in lightbulbs. 2. The amount of electricians present at the scene. 3. The type of equipment being used in the process. 4. The physical and mental stability of the electrician. The situation is solely dependent on the above factors.

Roses are red lemons are sour open Your legs and gimme an hour!

Knock knock Who's there? You're You're who? YOU'RE MOM IN MY BED!!! (i know it sucks)

If you die, and have 5 cents in your pocket, does the toast still land jelly side down?

Have you seen Jennifer Aniston's newborn baby? Neither has she.

Do you know what Stevie Wonder's house looks like? No. Well, neither does he.

You know what's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile where one's alive in the middle, and has to eat his way out.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Madeline McCan

What's black and hangs from trees? Tire swings

So a guy and his monkey walk into a bar I don't remember the rest of the joke but you mom is a whore

What did Osama say before he was shot? Nothing, it was a surprise attack.

Your mom is so nce that when you got into college she taught you to be more independent so you could succeed later in life.

Why did Sally fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

One night, I walked into a bar. I ordered a few drinks, and left later that night.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No. Neither has he.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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