What looks like poop and smells like cheese??

Whats the differnce betwwen a Wheelbarrow and a sack of dead babies The wheelbarrow is not in my garage

Even though Jenny was retarded, her parents didn't love her any less than the family dog.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

Two black guys walk into a country club and ask to play a round of golf. They are turned away because the aren't members of the club.

Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

Q - Why did the boy die? A - He had AIDS because his father raped him.

What is the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A Mexican is a human being of Aztec descent, while a bench is an inanimate object used most frequently as a place to sit.

A woman is about to buy a house and is faced with a difficult decision. She must choose which house she'll buy the next day. During the night she thinks about it and the next morning she has made a rational decision. What house did she choose ? TRICK QUESTION - Women can't make rational decisions.

Nick Demarco got butt due to the high number of females in his apartment

Why do black people always say to the left to the left... because they don't have rights.

yo mama so fat that she should be concerned because diabetes is a serious issue

Why does Santa wear sleigh bells? Because he's got leprosy.

A man walked into a bar. It was closed, so I don't see how this was possible.

What happens when you put an embryo in a blender? I don't know, I was too busy jerking off.

What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

A black guy, a Mexican guy and a Jew walk into a hospital. They are all undergoing the same chemotherapy treatment.

Why did the tree fall? I cut it.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Animal cruelty

why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

Three men are on a plane*. (*Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

Why did Aodhan not come into school? He was sick.

Q: What did the one legged homeless person get for christmass? A: Frostbite.

Why did the man push open the door? The sign said PUSH.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...