Your mama's so fat, that when she opened the window, wind came in!!!

a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

What did the dealer say to the addict? Sup.

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. And that's when I found out my Uncle Ted was a cross-dresser.

Whats blind and deaf? Hellen Keller.

Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

A baby seal walks into a bar... The bartender looks at it and says: too young.

There is something in my butt what is It. My thong

What do you call a person with no arms or legs rolling around in leaves? I don't know that seems like a highly improbable situation

Why was the school girl called a dork. Because a whale penis is called a dork, and she identically resembles a giant aquatic dick.

Why didn't the teenager go to high school? He was murdered

women's rights

A man walks into a bar, and promptly leaves because he left his kid in the car.

a fat kid walked up to me today at school and claimed he could do more pull ups than i. i found this very funny because i have known this boy since i was two months old, and he witnessed the day where i lost both of my arms to cancer.

where was Billy during the bomb? Every where

Why did the duck cross the road? To get cream cheese.

Want to hear an orphan joke? Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents

What happened to the chinese man who walked into a wall with a boner? He hurt himself.

What did the Banana say to the human. Nothing, because bananas are not capable of talking

While teaching her second grade class, Mrs. Peets asks the class a question from last night's homework, "OK class, what did you get for number five, 5+12=?" A kid in the back raises his hand slowly. "Yes James?", said the teacher. The kid in the back says, "My dick is as hard as a rock, Mrs. Peets."

What's funnier than 1 dead baby? Anything

What do you get when you multiply two by three? Six.

Q: What kind of time is it when you fall from a ladder and are moments from landing straight on a operational circle saw? Moral: ITS TIME TO SPLIT!

three people walked into a bar and there was a blackman,a jew,a white man and a nazi bartendor which ones did he shoot? The black and the jew and the white man

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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