Yo mama so fat that when she goes to the movies she sits next to everybody.

How do you kill a bunch of flies in one swat? Smack an African kid in the face.

What's faster a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk.

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a penis and a knife choose which one goes in you.

What did the Asian father say to his son when he got a b? Good job son!

What did the man and woman do in bed together? Sleep.

Your mom.

Camon is to Jerry Sandusky as Cole Ryder is to Will Higgins!

Whats brown and ryhmes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

What's the difference between a cat and a dog? They are different species... do i really need to explain the difference??

Steven hawkings shook my hand

What's the difference between your wife and the kitchen? One is a living organism

A woman walks into a bar. Guys aren't the only ones walking into bars.

A black man is running down the street with a purse in his hand. He was trying to catch up to the old woman who forgot it at the restaurant. She was very grateful.

Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window... ...But I am the Goddamn locksmith!

While i was driving, my son asked, 'Have you had an accident in the last 5 years Dad?' And I replied, 'You're almost four now son'.

Why did the blonde ask her doctor if she could get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anus surgery is the only solution.

Jesse gets back at people who takes his job, by trying to get with their sloppy seconds.. Emphasize trying.

Q:what does jgjdhter hjldhgukrh mean A: it means something it is a real word

A white kid, a black kid, and an Asian kid all try out for the basketball team. Which one makes the team? All of them, because they are all very good.

a man walks in to a bar. he says oww.

what is similar between a turtle losing its shell, and a man selling his chlothes and house? they are now both naked and homeless

There once was a beautiful princess named Snow White who lived with seven dwarves in the forest. One day, and old hag approached her and offered her an apple. She bit into the apple, chewed, and said,"Wow, that's tasty. Is this a Golden Delicious?" The hag said, "Why yes, it is. I have a private orchard. Perhaps I'll let you see it some time." The two promptly resumed their lives.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...