What was wrong with the tomato? Nothing.

a person who will soon die of beeties

-What do you say to a woman with Two Black eyes?. -Are you really that dumb to leave the kitchen twice -Elder High School

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? It depends on their painting skills.

two tomatoes are running and one stops to tie its shoe and the other says "Catch up!" This begins to put the first tomato on the spot and he runs after the second tomato without finishing his shoe and he trips falls and dies of severe brain damage

A person from Singapore eats

A guy walks into a bar. No one notices he has epilepsy.

Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

Autism... is not funny at all, it is a serious issue in today's day and age and must be addressed and cured

A man shaves at least 3 times a week, yet he has the longest beard in town, how is that possible? He shaves his head because he's embarrassed about his rampant and patchy balding.

How do you make a mailman cry? Kill his family.

What did a lot of money say? I FEEL LIKE A MILLION BUCKS!!!!!

a man walks into the bar and gets knocked out

Two women were sitting quietly.

Knock knock (who's there) Orange ( orange who) orange you glad to see

A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

What is Dora the Explorer's favorite food? Pussy.

what's gray, red, and goes over a 100 mph? a toad in a blender

You're so vein you are probably a tube that conveys blood from various parts of the body to the heart.

Chuck Norris has normal human strength.

Fart

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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