Why did Susie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Why didn't she catch herself? She had no legs. What did she get for Christmas? Cancer. What did she get for her birthday? Nothing, she died.

What did the little girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? Cancer.

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

A man goes to the doctor complaining of pain. Everywhere I touch it hurts, he tells the doctor. "The cancer has spread," the doctor says. "Go home and spend your last days with your loved ones."

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

After a long day on the movie set, Lindsay Lohan decides to go out to a bar. She gets really drunk and high on drugs and some guy takes her back to her trailer and stuffs her muffin.

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

Once upon a time a girl took a gun and shot herself in the face

A man walks into a bar and says: "ouch!"

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Animal cruelty

when god gives you lemons, you find a new god!

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Yo Mama is so stupid, she was riding her bike down the street when she was distracted and rode off a cliff. Oh crap I am so sorry.

Whats worse than the Halocaust? Your mom

A hayride would be fun.

Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because it's delicious.

You're on fire.

2+2= 478

Knock knock! Who's there? Atch! Okay.

"The lack of a punch line is the punch line" Oh

I can see you under there. Under what?

What do you call a black man in a suit? A lawyer.

Knock Knock Who's there? Sargeant John Smith mam. I regret to inform you that your husband died in the line of fire - I'm sorry.

What do you call a black man jumping out of a plane? A skydiver

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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