Why wasn't Abraham Lincoln a good president? Because he got shot in the head and died.

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What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked

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2 guys walk into a bar the first gys says id like a beer the second guy says me to

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What's funnier than diarrhoea? Cancer What's funnier than cancer? The holocaust

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What did the disabled kid do on friday? He fell down a flight of stairs.

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

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my name is piare (peeair) because my balder is empty

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What did Stephen Hawking say to the prostitute? A several garbled and mostly inaudible comment that she could not understand.

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What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after being hit by a train.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to prove he could. Did it workout? NO

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Touche.try eating something, I eat low carb crap when I am too sleepy, and today I guess it works.

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What's the easiest way to become President? Have a background in politics and a catchy campaign slogan that voting Americans can relate to.

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How do you kill a blonde? A gun.

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What did the rich man say to the poor man? i feel sorry for you

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what do you call a professional gamer Their name

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs.

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How do you get a nun pregnant? Artificial insemination.

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You are so ugly that for Halloween you had to trick or treat by phone.

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What do you call a place where all hopes and dreams go to die as this place is contained of depression and the lingering smell of death? www.anti-joke.com

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Know what's funny? Jokes.

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i like my coffee like i like my women ... with big titis

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A russian, a mexican, and an american are all sitting in a tavern. The russian ordered vodka, the mexican orders tequila, and the american orders a beer. When the waiter arrives, the russian throws his vodka into the air, shoots it, and says "we got too many of those in our country". The mexican tosses up his tequila and says "we got too many of those in our country". The american throws up his beer, shoots the mexican, and says "we got too many of those in our country". And then drinks his beer.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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when i yell your name i probably want your attention :) S.H.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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