what did the little girl do after drinking a smoothie? she choked and died a painful death.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbor.

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QUESTION: Why do black people do so poorly in school? ANSWER: Some statistics point to genetic disparities in intelligence between races, but others say it is due to more complicated social factors.

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Whats round, hard, and full of seaman? Well in the context I'm using it in, a submarine, but too the inappropriate mind when spoken out loud, could be registered as the homophone of seaman, semen, which would then lead you too think of male genitalia.

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Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. One looks at the other and says, "Can you pass the soap?" The other penguin says, "What do i look like, a typewriter?"

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Why did the black man win the race Because he was faster than all the other contestants

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are finally spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinical depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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why did Timmy fall off the the slide? he was hit by a plane why was Jimmy laughing? he watched Timmy get hit by the plane

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Why did the plane crash into the mountain? Because it was being piloted by a loaf of bread.

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Richard fell off a cliff. He hit the pavement and died on contact. If only he knew he could fly.

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you know what they say... hydrate or die

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Why did the pollock jump into the sea? A pollock is a fish.

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God said "let there be light" Chuck Noris said "say please

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Whats he best type of terroist? A dead one.

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What couldn't the stereotypical pirate get into the movie? Well, considering that the stereotypical pirate existed in the sixteenth to eightteenth centuries and the first motion picture wasn't made until the mid to late nineteenth century, also the technology for time travel does not exist nor has it ever, I would have to derive that he was not let in due to the fact that there was no way for him to ever exist at the same time that a movie would have been playing.

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A fish walks into a bad Fish dont walk

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What happened to the boy when he did nothing? The game.

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You're really messed up right now... elephants don't talk

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when god gives you lemons, you find a new god!

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extraction interveal means the opposite of integer

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What's brown and says "Hey, I'm a dog"? A talking dog, able to grasp the English language.

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Gale swallows.

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Me: Knock Knock! You: Door's Open!

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Why was Jeremy slow? He wasnt fast.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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