A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

I know a lady who is SOOO fat that when she steps into the ocean, she gets her toes wet!

Asian NASCAR.

what did the pregnant mexiCAN woMAN say while she was giving birth? A LOT of curse words

What is both dead and alive at the same? nothing, thats scientifically impossible you fool

There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One says "boy it sure is hot in here." The other says,"yeah like 350-375"

Why did the police stopped the black driver? Because one of his car's lights was busted.

Knock Knock. Ow! Why you hit me!?

Rebecca Black's new album.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I have cancer"

what's harder than dodging bullets? dodging rain

why was the boy in his closet? He is hiding because his father beats him because he is gay.

Q: what do you call someone on Anti Jokes A: Someone with no friends trying to find a funny joke to make friends.

i came... i saw... -myself when i came.

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wanna hear a joke? womens rights!

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident, your entire family is dead.

A black kid, an Asian kid, and a Jewish kid walk into a barrier. They are students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and they walk straight through the barrier onto Platform 9 3/4.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was Catholic and was having an identity crisis. Thinking that he was the road, he panicked and crossed himself.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

Why could'nt Boris fit in with the other kids? His name was Boris.

What is E.T. short for? He has small legs

Why did the orange have to wear a tie to the party? Because Rodric the Pear suggested it.

why do you often see black man dating fat chick?? because they have the brains to realise that fat chicks are just people and need love too

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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