What's the difference between a duck?

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What's green, red, and goes fifty miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

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What did the gay man say to the other gay man? “How was your day?“

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The economy.

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A jew, a black man, a muslim, an atheist, a christian, a catholic, a roman, a russian, a cuban, an english man, a horse, a cow boy, a gay, a lesbian, a dancer, a teacher, a father, a mayor, a politician and a fish are in a bar. Now that's one crowded bar.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a sponge is not a who, it is a what.

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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A horse walks into a bar... Horses are not indigenous to China.

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What did one platypus say to the other? Whatever noise platypuses make. I'm not sure. I am sure that they lay eggs though.

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Did you hear about that show where two crazy guy got on stage and the show had to be canceled. I didnt either.

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What's the number one killer in America? Death.

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Noses are red, pilots are blue I am dyxslexic boo who

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What has tomato Sauce And came from italy? Pizza

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What is white a can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

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How many Facebook friends does George Bush have? None because he doesn't have a Facebook.

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Why did the cow eat the grass? Only thing he had to eat.

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Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

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Women are like puzzles. Because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote. Puzzles still don't

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What did the Pikachu say to the Charmander? Pika pika pikachu pika!

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There was a small boy with a lollipop and a spinning hat. He died of lieukemia.

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A bass player walks past a bar. What? It could happen.

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A kid walks into a shop and asks the shopkeeper for a loaf of bread. The shopkeeper says, "White, wholemeal or multigrain?". The kid replies, "No thanks. My bike's outside".

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How many squirrels does it take to change a light bulb? 10 because they're so darn stupid!

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What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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