Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have Alzheimers, Cheese on Toast.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a truck

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They brutally whipped and tortured her.

You're on fire.

Why did the monkey fall out the tree? Because he was dead.

why do women have small feet. so they can stand closer to the sink

A girl walks into a bar. She unfortunately meets a man with a drinking problem. The man takes her home, strips her of her virginity and then beats her with a bat until she can no longer breathe. Her name was Laura Pratz.

A man walks into a bar... But, it's not funny because he's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartenders says, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because horses do not comprehend English. He then becomes startled by his surroundings and bolts out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

Sarah Palin

This comment is anti to jokes.

Knock, knock! “Who's there?” “The Gestapo.”

Where does the king keep his armies? In a variety of military barracks and bases situated around his kingdom where they are ready to be deployed for combat or peacekeeping operations.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf. That would be irresponsible/

What's worse than getting Alzheimer's? ........what am I doing here.....

How do you fit 100 ethiopians in a phone box? With great difficulty.

What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

What's green and has wheels? A cucumber with wheels.

I used to be an Adventurer like you... But then I decided that it was a dangerous form of employment and stopped.

how do you make a baby float take you foot of its head

y did simran cros rode? 2 get 2 uder side ofcurse. stopid nobs

If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you inside? American! What are you, a communist?

Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

Did you here about the guy who kidnapped Liam Neeson's daughter? Well, he died

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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