I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a penis and a knife choose which one goes in you.

what do you get when you cross a daniel lesiak with nothing?

What did Batman say to When they were heading to the Batmobile Robin get in the batmobile.

why was the kid sitting in a wooden chair? Because at the early age of four he was diagnosed with cancer and genital warts!

roses are red unless they are the pink ones oh yeah they're also pretty expensive

Whats small white and has a hole in it? A powdered Donut

What did Kermit the frog say at Jim Henson's funeral? Nothing.

What would happen if you put avocando, pineapple, sardines, peanut butter, brussel sprouts and milk into a blender and drank it. most probabley salmonala poisoning because the sardines were off.

Why did the flight attendant look scared every time every time she saw a muslim get on the airplane? Because her family got murdered in front of her before she came to work

Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he was hungry. The teacher would stupid to say it was a piece of cake

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothin. You already told her twice.

how do you confuse a brunette? paint yourself red and throw a fridge at her

Who wants water? I do.

Who won the championship last year? There was no championship

what is Stephen Hawking's condom brand called? Anti-Virus

What happens if you jump on barbed wire, but break your fall? You hurt your arm as well.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? Get on the ship.

How do you treat someone that is feels like a total failure? Treatment: Okay, draw a square on the board over there, but in order to succeed, you must fail at it. Patient one: Oh, I drew a cicrle :( Patient two: I drew a square :( Congratulations one you succeeded at failing! Now get outta here. Congratulations patient two, you succeeded at the given task, bye bye.

knock knock who's there? the police, we have a warrant for your arrest.

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

Aww, I knew you where a sweetheart at the core Nerochan, I mean I look up towards people that don't give a jack about what others think but I am not as good at it as you are. Now can you please spam that away like really quickly now?

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, Some don't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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