What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A black man walks into a bar and a white man says "we don't allow coloured men in here". the black man sighs and walks out, wondering what he ever did wrong, and makes his way to the liqour store, to buy some beer to drown his sorrows over his mothers death. On the way, a racist white man shoots and kills him. Then, at his funeral, someone makes the joke "Wow, how ironic. The black guy was the victim.."

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the boy reading the book do? He kept turning pages and reading until he came to the end, closed the book, and put it back onto the book shelf.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q: What did the farmer say when his tractor broke down? A: oh noo my tractor broke down.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

So I'm balls deep in this 9 year old...

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did little nancy call the police? Because her dad beats her toaster up.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

what did the man with Alzheimer's say to his son? who are you!?

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie roll pop? It would have to take a reasonable amount of licks for enough enzymes in the saliva to breakdown the hard candy part.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the boy run a marathon? because one of his good friends had just earlier passed away from pancreatic cancer and he decided to honor his memory by raising money through a 5k run. His family, friends and acquantances were all very proud of him and decided to hold the charity every year.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why was the black guy being talked to by several policemen? Because he was advertising a new renting deal on an apartment downtown and the two policemen were openly gay and have a right to live together.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

whats green and has wheels? a green tractor.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

"Ask me if I'm a tea pot" "Are you a tea pot?" "No" Try this on your friends

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's worse than tornadoes in the USA? Earthquakes in Japan.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

how do you get a blonde to stop following you? file a restraining order.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

why couldn't the boy use the computer He could i meant could

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the Armadyl godsword penetrated full Bandos? Because the AGS went up its tassets

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did batman say to robin before getting into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile robin.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the Buddhist monk say to the hot dog vendor? Monks do not speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q: Why can't Carl drive? A: Carl is a stone

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens have no sense of direction, he might have thought he was in wal-mart for all I care.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How long does it take you to count to 5? 5 seconds.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what did the cop say to the robber... freeze bitch hope you like prison food and penis

thumb_up thumb_down +17

I was flying in the sky but lost control and crashed. I woke up on the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops