In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

theres this guy that i REALLY like but today he was putting something in my locker, it was gumbie the little green bendy thing but i didnt want it to be in my locker so i slammed my locker, except the only thing was that his pinky was in the way!!!! oh gosh i felt soooooo bad!!!! turns out he went to the hostpital and got stitches!!!!!!! that made it worse on me!!!!!! he said he was finee but i still cant let that go!!!!!

Why did Martha Stewart's skin hurt? My friend has a skin condition :( and is dying, skin cancer is not something to make fun of.

A Dog walked into a bar and the bartenter said 'What can i get you' the dog dident say aneything cuz its a dog!!!!!

What happens when a bunch of animals break into your house... they eat you.

Why don't women wear watches?...Because the economy is at an all-time low and it would be reasonable to presume that a person couldn't afford an item like this, thus, trying to budget in a watch that could cost anywhere from 50-100$ would be a risky financial move depending on their yearly salary.

What did the guy say to the girl when she was on her knees? Stop playing with it put it in your mouth

what did the postman say to the dog, nothing he doesnt speak dog....... but his mother in law does.

What the difference between a rabbit an a eagle? They both fly except for the rabbit

How did the black kid pass his exam? He studied.

What did Sir Mix a lot say to the girl with a big butt? Your very beautiful.

You know Hellen Kellers retarded? No shes blind and deaf. Ehhh same thing.

Only in your math books can Carlos buy 14 cantaloupes without hus sanity being questioned.

Stephen Hawking can walk

Whats 1+1? The answer!

You mean I have to type in this little box? That's so embarrassing!

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination" and then he was resuscitated and became an atheist.

Roses are Tits Violets are Tits I love Tits TITS!

A: Knock, knock A: Knock, knock A: Um, knock, knock! B: Sorry, I was pretending that I wasn't home.

What is the longest sentence that a man knows? If it is used it in context, isn't round and the speaker attempts to quote the whole number - or at least all of it known to date, then any sentence involving the value of pi.

Felix? The Lucky cat? That is the only thing that comes to mind, I am dead tired, but I really don't mind staying up until I cant anymore physically, as for mentally I am getting pretty bad as for company.

what did the judge say to the lawyer during a trial. He said We are all in a court. thus concluding that the judge was retarted.

What's the difference between Jews and pizza? God likes pizza

why did the skeleton drop his juice? Because he has no stomach LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLO

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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