you: have you seen the movie constapated them:no you:its because it hasen't come out yet

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Did you hear about the guy who had his head chopped off? He's dead.

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why wont me daughter eat my feces

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Sugar is sweet, And so is she.

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This person shaved their head to gain attention. A klansman.

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A high school student finally gets the nerve to ask his long-time crush on a date. They begin dating, and eventually settle down and get married. After six months of marriage, she dies in a car crash and he spends years in therapy.

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Did you hear about Phil in accounting? No? Well he was trying to make a new type of car. He took the seats from a ford engine from a dodge, and the frame from a toyota. Do you know what he got? 5 years in jail.

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I have 13 hedge hogs in one hand and 4 pineapples in my van how many pikelets does it take to cover the roof. Purple because aliens dont wear hats.

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what's better than winning the special olympics?.. Not being retarded

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Whats worse than Sandy Hook Massacre? 9/11

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What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pig, because even if a pig could learn karate its still a pig.

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What does Malcolm X think about when hes horny? Sex!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Beacause the destination he was trying to reach was across this road Notice how he tried This is because he got hit by a car but know one cares for him

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Yo momma is so dumb, the tests came back positive for mental retardation and she has been given an expected life expectancy of 2 years.

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What's the difference between a black man and a Ginger? Their pigmentation.

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Hi my names Sarah and I love baby's. I don't think I could eat a whole one though

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Madeline McCan

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Whats worse than a man who has had a hard day at work, he goes to a bar and gets drunk, he goes home and beats his wife? I his wife was fat and had cancer

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Today, my doctor discovered I had a tumor in my brain the size of a walnut. FML.

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man1:did you know hellen keller had a dog? man2: no man1: neither did she

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Q: Whats worse than finding 10 babies in a trash can? A: Finding 1 baby in 10 trash cans!

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how do you stop a gang of black people from raping a white woman? throw a basketball

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Why couldn't the little kid get to sleep? His dog was on fire

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I suck at online but have a high gamerscore

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops