Heskey time.

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twenty three roaches walk into a bar. the bar is evacuated due to insects.

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Hi, this is Luke. Luke, I am your father. I burned my father's body after he died saving my life on a large space station. You're not my father, stop calling.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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your mommas so fat she has been advised to diet and excercise or run the risk of terminal illness

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Where do you find a quadriplegic? Where you left him

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Which is the smallest? A. Jupiter B. Whale C. Cow D. Bracelet Answer: D

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Why was the man in a great deal of pain? Because he was hit in the face with a sack of potatoes.

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What's the difference between a battered woman and a regular woman. There is absolutely no difference...

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Amazing

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What did the rabbi say at the party? Mazel Tov.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? A teenage girl was texting and driving, didn't see it, and now it's roadkill.

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If you play The Binding of Isaac backwards, it's about a boy who summons Satan in hell and ascends multiple floors and eventually revives him mom by sucking in tears. He eventually becomes less of a monster until going back to his home and living hapily with his mother, completely forgetting anything had ever happened.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? An opera singer singing in the shower

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How many people buried in a cemetery are dead? All of them.

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Why did the boy jizz?...........he was getting a blowjob!!!

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find the mistake in this sentence: Sadam Hussein: "hello" mistake: Sadam Hussein said hello!

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Why do we have brown eggs? Because black people have sex with chickens

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what did the left eye say to the right eye? "eye" see you

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Hitler and Jews become friends.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My family is dead

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A man walks out of his house and sees a......BIRD!!!

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woman's rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops