Why can't Sally ride her bike? Because Sally is eight months old and doesn't even understand what a bike is.

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If a tree falls on a house and there's no one there to hear it....Why was there no woman in the kitchen?

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is created to be used by multiple people for sitting down or other forms of rest, and does not have consciousness or the complex body systems of humans and other animals.

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Where do you find your quadriplegic dog? Right where you left it.

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What did the man say to the man? Awkward.

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What do you get when 100 sex-crazed gays are in the same room? About a quart.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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What did Helen Keller say to her eye doctor? Nothing, she is incapable of speech.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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A man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender immediately tells him to leave as they don't allow pets.

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What is white a can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

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It was the eve of December and a man was using a blanket why? because it was cold and he wanted to be able to function properly at work so his boss would not get mad at him because he respected his boss and wanted to make him happy

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yo momma is so ugly, she is unpleasant to look at!

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why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to a chicken

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Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

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What’s green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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How does one propagate a humorous reaction from peers and associates while not utilizing such characteristics as whit, jocularity, substance or auspicious punch lines? That's what she said.

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A man walks into a bar and slowly draws a pistol and kills 5 people.

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Jesus wept.

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A man walks into a bar. "Excuse me sir," he asks, "may I have a beer?" "No," says the bartender.

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How do you kill something thats already dead? You don't. It's dead.

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A bass player walks past a bar. What? It could happen.

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How did the little boy break his arm? He was trampleed by elephants.

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What did the priest say to the child.... nothing he just gripped his arm tightly and pulled down his pant

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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