So there is a blind man... and he walks past a fish market and takes a deep breath and says"Oh boy it sure does smell like fish out here".

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Your boat breaks down on the highway. How many squirrels does it take to eat a bannana? Squirrels do not eat bannanas but it would probably take a monkey 1.5 milliseconds.

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There were two friends, a girl and a boy. The girl had a ribbon tied to her neck, and every day the boy asked her why, yet she'd never tell him. They grew up together, and fell in love and still, she wouldn't tell him why she had the ribbon on her neck. They got married, and grew old, and still she wouldn't tell him. But one day, she said to him 'I'll show you why I keep this on my neck' and she took it off and her head fell off.

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why did the Chicken Cross the Road? Why must you question a Chicken's motives to Cross the Road?

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What do you call a man whos had his arms ripped off in front of you? An ambulance, because with an injury such as this, you can die anywhere between 10 and 45 minutes

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Why did the little kids call the boy "pornboy" Because he showed gay porn at the bus stop

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Steve Jobs is alive.

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Why was the guy stupid? 'Cause he was!

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What happens when you die? Your body gets decomposed by bacteria

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M's factory? For throwing away all the W's

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hey i jut met u, and i have alzeihmer, cheese and toast

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you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

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Why couldnt Jimmy ride a bike? refrigerator

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Why did the man have square fingers? Because he has Apert Syndrome

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Q: Why are Cats called Lolcat? A: They forgot to put "i" between l & c

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How long does it take to paint a house with babies? It matters how hard you throw them.

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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What do you call Morgan Freeman at a family reunion? Morgan Freeman.

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were driving on a highway. The redhead asked the brunette, who had the map, which was the next exit. The blonde was better with maps so she took it and announced where to go. They made the exit and enjoyed a nice lunch.

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Why is the sky blue? Because it is

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''Today is Star Wars day :)'' ''Why's that?'' ''guess'' ''I don't know :/'' ''It's May the 4th!'' ''And?'' ''May the 4th be with you :p''

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Did you here about the Asian couple who had a stupid baby? They named him Sum Ting Wong

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Why is life so hard? Because god isn't real

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Why is the moon gray? Why is it not?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops