Whats worse then the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple

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Once upon a time there was a very lonely man. He was kind, strong, handsome, smart, and basically everything that was good and that a girl wanted. Well, one day, through all his immense loneliness, he decided that it was time that he got into a relationship. Knowing that he deserved a competent and pure woman, he went to a local church to search for his perfect match. That night, he took home with him the most beautiful and purest of all the women in the church, brought her to his room, and whipped out his junk on her face.

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Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You know. You know who? "Call him Voldemort.... Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself."

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What is bright yellow and tastes like Gatorade? Antifreeze

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Arrow to the Knee

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What type of cheese is not your cheese? The cheese that belongs to another person.

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Know what's worse than being publicly embarrassed in front of your crush? Jeffrey dahmer

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What did the small baby faucet say to the daddy faucet? Nothing, they are inanimate objects and cannot talk.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom...

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What do super heroes say after they beat the villain? Nothing, super heroes are not real.

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why did Sussie fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock knock whose there not Sussie

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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What's a vampire's favorite subject in school? Probably math.

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What’s green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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123457

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God said "let there be light" Chuck Noris said "say please

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Who's fat? Holly Davis.

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There was a small boy with a lollipop and a spinning hat. He died of lieukemia.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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Knock knock. Whose there. Uninterupting black lady. Uninter.... MMMMMMMHHHHMMMM. Black ladies never listen

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thumbs up!

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A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

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What do you call a group of homosexuals placing an order at McDonalds? Gay

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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