Q: Why is 8 afraid of 9? A:Because 9 killed 8's family

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A rooster is sitting on the top of a house. It lays an egg. Which way does it roll? This can be solved by using the dimensions and angles of the roof to find the most probable direction it would roll (Incorporating in the power of gravity of course). Of course if the egg from the roosters uteris came out in an akward or unlikely way, it could roll the other way.This can be factored in very quickly because with the video evidence of the rooster having the egg you can see how it was delivered(the video is not of which way it rolls, just of the delivery).

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My girlfriend gave me her first ever blowjob last night. I came in her mouth and she washed it down with a can of Carling. Obviously she had to get that horrible taste out of her mouth, so she gave me another blowjob.

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There is something fishy about.... the fish curry at home

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Your mom is such a slut that your dad didn't even ask her if you were his biological child and raised you as if you were, regardless of what the dna results may suggest.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You think this will rhyme But it's not gonna

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STFU Stop Tickling Fuzzy Unicorns they really don't like it

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what is worse than falling off a bridge? .. getting pushed off a bridge

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Did you know that Obama wasn't born in the United States*? *the contiguous United States

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Stop asking stupid questions.....

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Jeff has 45 candy bars. He eats 40. What does Jeff have? Diabeetus

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Whats red, and spins at fast speeds? A baby in a blender

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how do you hurt sombody? cut off their legs.

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why was little jonny not playing in the baseball game? his legs were shattered in a terrible lawn mowing accident.

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Q: What's black, blue, and dead? A: My wife after our fight last night.

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how do you beat the system? throw your xbox out a window.

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A mexican walks out a mexican restaurant.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Oh, I thought you could tell me. I will ask someone else. See you later.

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whats worse than falling off of your bike? thats as bad as it gets,try to think of something else

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A man sets his house on fire. His wife comes home, what did she ask? Why'd you set the house on fire?

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ask me if i have a place to call home> 'have you a place to call home?' no im sad and lonely.

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Why are all black people fast? They aren't its a stereotype.

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what happens when steven hawking walks into a bar? everyone cheers at the miracle of science.

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okay so this guy walks into the bar and says DON BE STUPE SHE SPIT GOOD AND EVERYTHIN. why did he say that. BECAUSE EVERYBODY HATES HIS SPIT

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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