After a long day on the movie set, Lindsay Lohan decides to go out to a bar. She gets really drunk and high on drugs and some guy takes her back to her trailer and stuffs her muffin.

What do you call a group of black men jumping off a building? Chocolate Rain

Your mother is such a whore that she has consensual sex with a lot of people...

What's the color of an apple? It varies depending on the type of tree and climate the fruit grows in.

Why did the murderer buy a lizard? He thought that they were cute.

What do you do to someone you hate very much? You kill them.

Q. why can't hellen keller drive? A. because she is dead

Q: What happened to Michael Jackson yesterday? A: Nothing.

What do homosexual men do during sex? I don't know, but if you want to, I suggest you ask one of them.

Runescape.

Asian NASCAR.

What do birds need when they're sick? Medical attention

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate flowers and am making fun of them by messing up this originally beautiful poem about those repulsive manisfestations of pure evil.

The NBA lockout

Q: what do you call someone on Anti Jokes A: Someone with no friends trying to find a funny joke to make friends.

What happened to the public server who went to the 5 dollar brothel? He contracted syphilis and died several months later.

What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Your mother." "Your mother who?" "Really?"

a duck walks into a bar, sits down and asks for grapes. the bartender says, "no, we don't serve grapes." so the duck leaves. the next day the duck goes back to the bar, takes a seat. "got any grapes?" the bartender says, "i already told you we don't serve grapes here. if you come in here and ask for grapes one more time, i'm going to staple your beak to the wall!" the duck leaves. the next day, the duck returns, sits at the bar and asks, "got any staples?" the bartender replies, "no, but there's an Office Max next door where you might find some."

What do super heroes say after they beat the villain? Nothing, super heroes are not real.

What did the man say to the man? Awkward.

What did the Nazi call the Jew? Alex.

Do not believe the sentence below. Believe the sentence above.

your mama is so fat that she weighs 261 pounds.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...