Roses are red, violets are blue, my name is cartman, kyle you're a jew

In the time it has taken you to read this, a small African child has died.

Whats Bin Laden's favorite store 9/11

Why could the grandma chew? She couldn't she had no teeth

What's black, white and red all over? A nun that's just been shot.

If you throw a red stone in a blue lake what does it become? Simply a wet stone.

Why did the helicopter crash? Because the driver was fat.

What did the father give to his daughter? AIDS.

Why was the asain studing? Because he had a 59 in math and needed a C to tay on the footbal team.

Whats worse than the holocaust? Ryan

What's the longest word in the English language? Tuna. (I lied about it being the longest word in the language.)

what do you call a black man with a knife in his hand? a surgeon.

I bought a pound of gold for my new gold ring, later that day I lost it

Why did the gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens foot.

The optimist sees the glass as half full. The pessimist sees the glass as half empty. The average American sees a half-finished glass of water that is not flavored and is therefore is not worth any reasonable person's time.

A construction worker walks into a bar. He says "Ow! That hurt!" And walked in the opposite direction to the manager to complaint about the obvious health code violations of this site.

Why doesn't God like fruitcake? Because God doesn't exist.

What's the difference between a bucket of shit and a black guy? -the bucket.

*see an orphan* Knock knock Whos there Not you parents ...

roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.

Why did Billy fall over? Because someone tripped him.

Q: what do you get when you mix a bull dog and a shiitzu? A: a dog

Brian: Have you seen my slippers? Louise: What the hell are you doing in myhouse? Help ! Police! Brian: You have amnesia like in that film 50 first dates Louise: What film? I don't remember that Brian: Exactly

Why did the Muslim boy crash a plane into a building? Because the remote-controlled plane suddenly malfuctioned and crashed into a nearby apartment complex.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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