A man sets his house on fire. His wife comes home, what did she ask? Why'd you set the house on fire?

Q: What do yoiuo call an Italian butler? A: Vinny

A grandma starts pinching her grandsons cheeks and saying who's a little cutie pie the baby begins to bleed cause his grandmas nails are peircing his skin

What did the man say when he lost his keys? I lost my keys. What did the man say when he saw an elephant in the distance? There is an elephant in the distance.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Where am I

What has eight wheels and cost more than a Lamborghini? Two Lamborghinis.

What did the black man say to the fat Irish lady? Hi.

Women's rights.

Why did the black man buy a watermelon? To give to his wife to cut up for his family to have at a picnic

Roses are red Violets are blue You are green Curse you!

What did the 20-year old woman say too the old man? HI GRANDPA!

Why a man without hands and without legs want to stay in a barrel? He actually doesn't, but is unable to get out of it.

Try it Yourself »

No Nero, you see, a great man once told me that happiness is not something you look for and eventually find, but something that you decide that you already are.

What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

Your mama's so fat that when she farted, gas came out!

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

I just found my mum has Alzheimer's, I hope it isn't contagious cause my mum has it too

women's rights.

A man is playing pacman, on his last life, and is cornered. He inserts another coin in the slot.

Bride: "He went to Jared's!!! Ex: "But every Kiss Begins with Kay...."

Why did the chicken cross the road? Unfortunately there are billions of chickens in the world and based on the question it is not possible to determine which specific chicken is being referred to. Even if we were able to ascertain this knowledge it would be unlikely that we could determine its purpose, as chickens don't usually make decisions based on logical thought.

There is something fishy about.... the fish curry at home

What happened to the baby bird? It fell out the nest

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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