Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was blind.

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what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

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Some people devote their to talking in their head. Jesus christ.

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Whats red and crawls up your leg? A homesick abortion.

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What do the NRA and PETA have in common? Both are prominent interest groups from whom political candidates try to obtain votes.

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What do you think when you see an asian woman behind the wheel of a car? She's very attractive.

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What's Mackaulay Culkin's favorite salad dressing? Neverland Ranch.

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What do you call a dog that acts like a cat, likes to pretend he's human, and whose name is "Moose"? A dog. His personality traits have no effect on the changing of his species.

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How did Bill Framex die? He didn't because he isn't real.

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Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

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Why can't Emily swing because she has no arms Knock Knock Who's there Not Emily

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How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask him to lower the volume a bit and maybe also play a quieter tune.

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What do you call a white guy? A caucasion man.

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Q: What is tall, white, and shaped like a house? A: a tall white man, if you break his limbs and twist them into the rectangular shape of a house.

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Whats the difference between wayne rooney and shrek? Well, one, shrek is fictional. Two if he was fictional,he is green. Wayne rooney is not green. Three wayne rooney plays for a football team, surely shrek has no idea what football is. The list goes on.

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could switching to Geico save you 15% or more on car insurence? Does a bear shit in the woods?

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Why are black people afraid of tigers? Because tigers eat people

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Have you seen the flock of birds? probably not because they hit a window and all died at impact.

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I can't remember the punchline for this joke so I recommend you stop reading this...why are you still reading this whats wrong with you!!!!

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Why did the chicken have a sore neck? Because the farmer cut the chicken's head off, and the body ran around for three minutes until it finally bled to death.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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Why didn't Josh go to school? On his way to school, a majestic flying homeless man hit him in the head with a sea cucumber.

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A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

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How did young Austin get home while walking on the side of the street ? He didnt. He was hit by a car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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